• Send us Mail
  • Follow us on Twitter
  • Join our Facebook Group
  • Subscribe to our RSS Feed
  • Search Site

Polari Magazine

  • Home
  • Up Front
    • Editorial
    • Clementine: The Living Fashion Doll
    • Polari Safari
    • WTF? Friday
    • Bulletin Board
    • Polari Facts
  • Features
    • Interviews
    • Features
    • Gallery
    • Opinion
    • Heroes & Villains
  • Community
    • Oral Histories
    • Coming Out Stories
    • Relationships
    • IDAHO
    • LGBT History Month
    • Blogs
  • Reviews
    • Books
    • Film and Television
    • Music
    • Stage
    • Visual Arts
    • Classics: Books
    • Classics: Film and Television
    • Classics: Music
  • About
    • About Polari Magazine
    • Contributors
    • Contact

You are here: Polari Magazine / Relationships / A Cooler Climate Up North

A Cooler Climate Up North

12 Jun 2013 / Comments Off / in Relationships/by Scott De Buitleir

Is Scottie’s cross-border romance cooling off or just a case of bad timing…

A Cooler Climate Up North, Scott De Buitléir

I couldn’t tell if it was the hangover, the exhaustion or something else, but something wasn’t quite right. I didn’t want to leave him, and I hoped that he didn’t want to leave me. If he did, he certainly never hinted at it. Still, it was difficult to ignore the feeling that we weren’t enjoying each other’s company anymore.

I had travelled to Belfast to see him and to even the scoreboard; until then, he had visited me twice and I had only one date in his hometown. One bus and just under three hours later, we meet for a drink in Belfast’s main bear bar. He was tired after a long day at work, and long bus/train trips always drain me of energy, so neither one of us were necessarily bouncy. We were still clearly delighted to be back in each other’s company, even if a pillow or two would’ve been appreciated. For a power-nap, you ask? Yeah, why not.

We only have enough time to catch up a bit before I’m due to meet up with a friend and go to a house party to watch the Eurovision – an event I follow almost religiously, so let’s not bring up how the UK beat Ireland this year! Tired as we were, we still left each other’s company with a smile on our faces, with the intention of spending the following day together. So far, so good.

The morning after, my brain was punishing me for agreeing to share my friend’s bottle of Captain Morgans, and soon my Nordie was en route to pick me up for some post-Eurovision wound-licking over lunch. The food was just what I needed, but it was clear that I wasn’t the only one who had a good night. He was watching the show with his family, which might lead you to ask why we didn’t watch it together and make a night of it. Simply put, if I’ve been dating a guy for only a few weeks, the last thing I need is to show him how Euro-crazy I get during May. No, it was better that we spent that night apart and instead, hung out hungover the day after.

Or at least, that’s what I thought. For almost the entire day, both of us acted like we would’ve preferred to have been in bed, but for nothing more other than to sleep for the afternoon. This would’ve been fine if we both lived a few minutes away from each other – we could’ve postponed it for another day and slept the hangover and exhaustion off, but we didn’t have the time. Fair enough, I wasn’t leaving Belfast until the following night, but he wasn’t going to be free at all then. This was our only chance to spend some quality time together, but while our minds wanted to do just that, our bodies were finding it hard to agree.

Much as I tried to keep my mind calm, I couldn’t help but wonder – and occasionally worry – if this was the beginning of the end already. It was a total anti-climax to what I had expected, especially when our previous dates felt like they had fireworks every few minutes. The seeds of doubt had already been sown since his last visit to Dublin, but even then, the passion had made me forget that.

This is not gonna last, a voice kept saying in my head, but I still can’t figure out if it was my heart or my head that kept trying to shut it up.

[To read the previous instalment of Scott’s column, click here.]

‘Scottie’ Illustrations by Stephen Charlick

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Tumblr
  • Pinterest
Tags: cross border romance, dating rules, gay relationships column, scott de buitléir, stephen charlick

Related Posts

Did you like this entry?
Here are a few more posts that might be interesting for you.
Related Posts
When Love Came To Town
Last Chance(?)
Waiting For Tonight
How To Let Go
Forgetting The Rules
The Night I Pulled… a Girl
Beauty and the Kinky Beast
Caution: Bears Gathering
Calling It A Night

Search Polari

Latest Posts

  • Polari Magazine 2008-2014December 3, 2014 - 6:16 pm
  • Tearing Up Their Map: An Interview with LambDecember 2, 2014 - 2:45 pm
  • Future Islands • GigDecember 2, 2014 - 1:41 pm
  • Puppets with Attitude (at Christmas)December 1, 2014 - 6:30 pm
  • The Aesthetic of Voyeurism: Interview with Antonio Da SilvaDecember 1, 2014 - 1:25 pm
  • Broke With Expensive Taste • Azealia BanksNovember 28, 2014 - 3:59 pm
  • Royalty Strutting on an American College Stage: Miss and Mr. Gay ISU 2014November 27, 2014 - 2:59 pm
  • Bright Light Bright Light: Everything I Ever WantedNovember 26, 2014 - 11:15 am
  • Jaime Nanci And The Blueboys: ‘Toy’ TalkNovember 25, 2014 - 4:09 pm

About Polari Magazine

Polari Magazine is an LGBT arts and culture magazine that explores the subculture by looking at what is important to the people who are in it. It’s about the lives we lead, not the lifestyles we’re supposed to lead.

Its content is informed & insightful, and features a diverse range of writers from every section of the community. Its intent is to help LGBT readers learn about their own heritage and to sustain a link between the present and the past.

Polari is designed to nurture the idea of community, whether that be social and political, or artistic and creative. It is your magazine, whether you want to read it, or whether you want to get involved in it, if you're gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans, or queer.

Polari Magazine is all these: it's a gay online magazine; it's a gay and lesbian online magazine; it's an LGBT arts and culture magazine. Ultimately, it is a queer magazine.

Latest Posts

  • Polari Magazine 2008-2014December 3, 2014 - 6:16 pm
  • Tearing Up Their Map: An Interview with LambDecember 2, 2014 - 2:45 pm
  • Future Islands • GigDecember 2, 2014 - 1:41 pm
  • Puppets with Attitude (at Christmas)December 1, 2014 - 6:30 pm
  • The Aesthetic of Voyeurism: Interview with Antonio Da SilvaDecember 1, 2014 - 1:25 pm
  • Broke With Expensive Taste • Azealia BanksNovember 28, 2014 - 3:59 pm
  • Royalty Strutting on an American College Stage: Miss and Mr. Gay ISU 2014November 27, 2014 - 2:59 pm
  • Bright Light Bright Light: Everything I Ever WantedNovember 26, 2014 - 11:15 am
  • Jaime Nanci And The Blueboys: ‘Toy’ TalkNovember 25, 2014 - 4:09 pm

Twitter

Tweets by @PolariMagazine

Archive

  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012
  • September 2012
  • August 2012
  • July 2012
  • June 2012
  • May 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • July 2011
  • April 2011
  • March 2011
  • February 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • October 2010
  • September 2010
  • August 2010
  • July 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010
  • March 2010
  • February 2010
  • January 2010
  • December 2009
  • November 2009
  • October 2009
  • September 2009
  • August 2009
  • July 2009
  • May 2009
  • March 2009
  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
© Copyright - Polari Magazine - Wordpress Theme by Kriesi.at
  • scroll to top
  • Send us Mail
  • Follow us on Twitter
  • Join our Facebook Group
  • Subscribe to our RSS Feed
Website Privacy & Cookies